Aza and Dee are Having a Baby!

Yes it’s true! After all this time we are super-duperly happy to announce that we are indeed having a baby! I know most of you had probably given up on us completely in this regard, but hey, 20 years wait isn’t that bad is it?!?!

The last several months has been pretty arduous and stressful as we unfortunately couldn’t do it the “fun” way and needed the help of the lovely and super smart people at Fertility Associates! With odds of IVF working being only around 42% we’re so happy to be at the stage where we can finally announce to the world…

We’re Pregnant!

Now this webpage is finally live, yes mum, you can tell everyone on the planet!

Oh, and if you want to follow our journey, start at the bottom. Ta!

22-August-2009

And here he is!

Our beautiful little man, Cody Charles Koolen-Bourke was born on August 22nd 2009 at 2:37pm and is doing wonderfully. He was born by emergency C-Section and weighed 3860 grams (8.5 lbs) and was 52cm long. We were in hospital for nearly a week but are back home and settling in. We will leave this page here now, and direct you to his own one that will be coming soon. For now, here is a picture of the bundle of awesome.

14-Aug-2009

Holy Moly! It’s been 6 months since we last updated the baby page and man has time zoomed by! From the banner at the top you can see that we’re about 3 days from the due date, so we are getting really really excited now. Just a few more days and we can hold our baby boy!

So, what’s been happening in the last 6 months with The Boy? I’ve added a few dates under this one (keeping the chronological order) with some of the things that have happened – including the 4D!!! movie!

The quick summary is things have been great. He’s grown really well and is very very active. In fact he’s grown so well they’re thinking that he will be a 9 pounder (4,082.3313 g if you ask ConvertBot on the iPhone ) which isn’t making Dee too happy.

That said, tonight we had a bit of a scare. He’s normally busy kicking and turning and dancing quite regularly but he was very very quite all day today. This evening Dee hadn’t felt him move at all and even after trying to lie in positions that would normally get him moving, having cold water drink to get him active, and a little prodding he wasn’t moving.

We rang the obstetrician and they said to come in for a check. I think I broke the land-speed record for Birkenhead to Auckland Hospital and we arrived, went to level 9 and they asked us to wait in a room. A few minutes passed and I’m thinking “Err, our baby isn’t moving and this isn’t normal, where is someone?!, I hope someone comes soon.” 2 milliseconds seconds later I couldn’t wait any more so I went and made it clear we were rather concerned and a passing midwife was directed to our room. She put on the heart monitor and “badoom badoom”, there it was! PHEW!

We sat there for about 1/2 an hour with the monitors on and then the obstetrician turned up, checked things over, gave Dee a scan and said everything was all good but to call us tomorrow if we’re concerned still. So we can rest easy tonight…..unless he decides to come!

Aaron: I must say that while having a monitor on your baby is nice to see that he’s got a beating heart, watching the heart rate fluctuate between 106BPM and 150BPM is rather disconcerting!

5th-Aug-2009 (added on 14th August – sorry!)

Well that was a long week or two! We have finally finished the decorating of the room! The Pink Batts are in, new linings up, new trim, wardrobe extended and painting done! We must say that it was WELL and truly worth the effort, even though we’re cutting it fine regards delivery date! The room is unbelievably warmer with Pink Batts in, we had no idea it’d make that much difference. We also have a heat pump installed which is going to be wired up soon – we are so looking forward to that! Pictures to follow! ONe thing I have to say, is that if someone says “Put everyone up and THEN paint the walls”, do it! We painted the walls before putting the trim up, thinking that we’d avoid having to mask everything. You then have to deal with gaps in the trim which you should fill, scuffs and marks that get on the walls when the builder is putting it up and other bits and pieces that make it a nightmare.

As far as Baby goes, he’s doing well but Dee is starting to feel it, big time. She’s been growing quite rapidly and she is starting to retain A LOT of water, especially in her legs. The obstetricians think it’s all OK and nothing to worry about because her protein and sugar levels are all good so they don’t think anything’s happening like Diabetes or Preeclampsia. She is however, having a real hard time getting up and moving around now, and she’s started to get carpal-tunnel which is very painful and causing some issues.

7th-Jul-2009 (added on 14th August – sorry!)

With everything going well and not much to worry about, we thought we’d throw a little bit of stress in the mix and start some renovations!

Yup, with about 5 weeks to go, we looked at our bedroom and decided that we needed to fix the crappy wallpaper that was bubbling all over the walls. We decided to strip it off, skim coat and repaint and Dee spent about 2 days trying to get it smooth during the week. Come the weekend Aaron joined in and within 5 minutes had grabbed a sledge hammer and started smashing the wall linings down! It will be a good move we’re sure because our house has no insulation so we thought that if we’re going to this trouble, a little more and a little more money to make a big difference is worth it. We hope we can get it done in a week or two.

23-Jun-2009 (added on 14th August – sorry!)

Today was the day we time travelled into the future and got the chance to see what our gorgeous boy looks like, albeit in wiggly, flattened, monochrome! We went into Insight Radiology to have a 4D scan done. 4d is essentially a 3d image over time so we got to see The Boy moving, yawning and scratching his face. Aaron thought it would be a pretty mundane event but when he got there he was blown away. You can see all his features and face shape and finger and arms and it’s just mind blowing for us as soon-to-be parents. We’ve popped a clip up here of it for you to see!

11-Feb-2009

Today was another scan day and this time it was just like a theme park! Not only did we get the experience, but we came away with the 12 pack of photos and the DVD! We even got to see little one briefly with fancy 4d (3d over time) technology. The real 4d will come quite a bit later.

Everything was good; 2 arms, 2 legs, heartbeat, brain with 2 lobes, spine, good nose (Thanks to Aaron no doubt) and everything else looking good. Even some suspicious looking boy-like bulgy bits between “his” legs, although they can’t guarantee that for another few weeks.

Baby now measures 6.7cm from head to bum, and even though “he’s” that tiny, mum is having trouble fitting into her clothes already! Here’s a few pics from today:

Larsen Sasquatch Foot	4Dee!	Hitching a ride

3-Feb-2009 (12 weeks)
Yay, another milestone! Deidre has been off the progesterone pessaries a full week and despite a bit of scary cramping in the first few days everything is going great; everyone still on board! Deidre has even been told she can go swimming again or try a warm bath, things on the ‘no go’ list for the past 4 months. A little chocolate and decaf tea and coffee is also back on the menu. All things sorely missed!

Lots more vomiting and tummy swelling this week. We went shopping to have a first sneak peek through some baby shops (aw – very exciting) and bought Dee a few new loose fitting clothes as even though she’s gained hardly any weight nothing seems to fit properly anymore, even clothes she wore when she was 5 kg heavier! The reason for all the tummy swelling is apparently a mixture of hormones making everything very relaxed plus a growing baby inside a uterus now the size of a grapefruit that’s pushing and squashing all the other organs out of the way. Hopefully in the next few weeks Dee’s uterus should get too big to fit in her pelvis and slide forward allowing everything else to slip back in place – giving her tummy that proper baby shape rather than the weird bloated shape it currently has. Dee is NOT enjoying her current tummy situation at all!
Vomiting record set this week: 2 pm Saturday – 2pm Sunday: 7 +

27-Jan-2009 (11 weeks)
Today, thank goodness is the last day of progesterone pessaries. Very scary but also a big relief as it was getting harder and harder for Dee to keep them down. Dee has had some of the worst vomiting yet and is regretting not taking the prescription offered by the OB last week… but surely the vomiting can’t last much longer can it?? Even teeth brushing seems to set it off. Of course its all very reassuring and also shows the baby is doing well, and if we go a day without vomiting it’s worse worrying something has gone wrong.

We have decided to wait at least another week to tell everyone about the pregnancy, we want to be a week free of any hormone support first to be sure we really have transitioned from the IVF drugs to a ‘normal’ pregnancy.

Given Deidre’s age (an ancient 37) and the fact IVF increases the risk of chromosomal abnormalities we decided to book a nuchal scan test for 11 February. We’re still unsure whether we would do an amnio even if the results come back as ‘high risk’ but it can’t hurt to have more information and it will hopefully give us more reassurance everything is fine. Its seems strange that a chance of 1 in 380 is classified as ‘high risk’, but that amnio is marketed as ‘very safe’ with its 1 in 100 risk of miscarriage!

22-Jan-2009 (10 weeks 2 days)

Had the first visit with our official LMC today, Auckland Obstetric Centre. We decided to go with them primarily because our little blob of joy is an IVF baby and we wanted to make sure they had the best medical care they could get. We’ve come this far and spent this much money, what’s another $4400!

We got the rundown on Listeria, Toxoplasmosis and eating well, especially calcium because the little blighter will suck as much as it can from mum. When we told her we were vegan she was initially concerned but nothing like other doctors that we’ve told in the past. She simply told us to have soymilk and that it contains as much calcium as milk (something we knew anyway). It was nice to see she didn’t get all hysterical about it.

We were also informed of all the tests that we can do in the coming months to check for genetic abnormalities, primarily Downs Syndrome. The non-invasive tests including the Nuchal Transparency test and the Maternal Serum tests are the ones coming up in the next few weeks if we want to do them. Combined they would give us about an 85% accurate categorisation of low or high risk. After those tests, one can then decide if they want to have an Amniocentesis where they take some of the Amniontic fluid from within the uterus and that will give you a more accurate test. Problem with that one is that there is a 1% chance of miscarriage resulting from the test. Not good.

Finally we also had another quick look at baby and this time we got a surprise. We got a good profile of the little bugger, heart beating, and the body was actually looking more like a baby now and then all of a sudden it decided it wanted to get down and boogie. It waved it’s legs and arms around a bit, then turned on it’s side and slid down inside the uterus. From there it was hard to get a good shot for a print, but here it is anyway. And no, that is not something sticking out of it’s face, that’s it’s far side arm! We decided to rename our little one ’stumpy’, as he/she is definitely no longer just a ‘blobby’.

The OB said because the placenta is at the back and baby will be kicking towards the front of Dee’s tummy that we should be able to feel the movement really well once the baby gets a bit bigger. The OB offered to write a prescription to help with the nausea, it seems to be clearing up so we said no, not to worry.

We also asked when we should start telling people and were told to go for it in the next week or so as the risk of anything happening is now really small – WAHOO!

13-Jan-2009 (9 weeks)
A week spent deciding who will be our primary maternity provider. With this being such a big decision we took a systematic and organised approach looking at all the options available. We booked consultations with (1) a midwifery clinic (2) a clinic offering joint midwife/Obstetrician (OB) care (3) a specialist obstetrics clinic. All were really great but in the end we felt we needed some kind of arrangement with an obstetrician heavily involved, given Dees age, because we are having an IVF baby, and no assurance it will be as easy to get pregnant again if something goes wrong. During the consultation at Auckland Obstetrics Centre we even got an unexpected peek at “blobby”. A bit terrifying but everything is looking great. The difference from our last scan just a week ago and this one was amazing. Instead of just a bean like object on the screen this time we could see arms and legs and a huge head! Really neat, and much bigger.

5-Jan-2009 (7 weeks 6 days)

Went into Fertility Associates today for the “heartbeat” check scan. This is the first major scan to check the baby is alive, growing well and confirm there is a heartbeat; although not all scans this early will pick up the heartbeat yet. Even though our blood tests had continuously shown Dee’s HCG levels were progressing normally, after two weeks of bleeding it was impossible not to be a bit terrified that something awful had happened, that the growth wouldn’t be right or something crucial had come away meaning the pregnancy couldn’t continue. But we were telling ourselves that everything was all good cause Dee is already having what we hope is ‘morning sickness’ and there had been no more bleeding but we were both concerned to say the least. Well, we shouldn’t have been.

The scan passed over the baby and we thought we saw something, then the doctor settled on the position and there it was! A little blob of about 16 pixels (1.4 cm) with a tiny little heart pulsating away happily. Pure awesomeness! Really emotional, I think we were both a bit teary eyed. The doctor said once you get a clear scan to show the embryo is this size and can see the heart beat our odds of miscarriage drop dramatically to just 2-3%!!!!!!!! We’re letting ourselves get properly excited now, in fact we went straight out and bought a week by week pregnancy book

On the downside, because of the two weeks bleeding that happened, we were told still no sex and no swimming or baths for Dee.

This week Dee also went back to work full time and is finding it really hard going. She takes a pillow in so if she needs to she can crash and have a nap under her desk. A vomit cup on the ready is another essential requirement. Shes a bit paranoid of being caught asleep under the desk though as no one but her boss knows anything is up! This week Dee tried sea sickness bands to see if they would help with the nausea, the jury is still out but here’s a hint – NEVER leave them on overnight, even if you are vomiting during the night and think you need them. In the morning Dee’s hands were so swollen she couldn’t put her usually VERY loose fitting watch on.

29-December-2008 (7 weeks 1 day)
Awesome news – Dee’s bleeding finally seems to have stopped, after 2 weeks, and the latest blood test shows an HCG level of over 40,000. The clinic says no more blood tests required and its full steam ahead for our first scan next week. Hopefully Dee’s body will be happier now its gotten rid of whatever gunk and old trapped blood must have been in there. Just 7 more sleeps until we get to see our little one!

23-December-2008 (6 weeks)
Dee is still bleeding, light but freaking out at clots and gunky bits now coming away. This weeks blood test showed HCG levels had jumped to over 16,000 so despite it all everything seems on track and the clinic still says not to worry (how to do that?!) Hang in there bub!!

We are both trying really hard to relax and enjoy the holidays. However we decided not to travel down to Napier to see Aaron’s family because we want to be near our IVF clinic if anything goes wrong.

Dee decided to tell her boss whats going on as she has been too sick and stressed to work some days and it deserved a proper explanation. Her boss was great and it probably helped that she is also pregnant at the moment so was really sympathetic to what is going on. She even gave Dee the number of a place she knew that we could go and pay for a private scan if we feel like we need to know whats going on sooner or check things.

18-December-2008(5 weeks 2 days)
Yay (at least for now) all the bloodwork looks good. HCG levels had risen from 370 to 3,896 and progesterone levels off the charts at 127 (way up on last week). However because with a miscarriage there can be a delay before HCG levels start to drop they want to run a repeat blood test next week to check that the HCG levels have continued to rise and don’t start to fall. Its so nerve wrecking, Dee finds herself knicker checking every hour or so. It would be awful to miscarry at Christmas, hoping its not going to be really stressful. We just have to keep believing our little embie is safely tucked away in there and happy despite it all.

17-December-2008(5 weeks 1 day)
Our worst nightmare. Dee has started bleeding. We are trying to stay positive but are pretty panicked because so many people doing IVF seem to miscarry at 5 weeks. On the chat list Dee is on, of the 10 in her group that got positive pregnancies tests 4 have already miscarried at week 5. Dee rung the clinic and they are upping the dose of progesterone she is on, to 4 pessaries every 8 hours, 2 of the 4 to be taken orally which feels really bizarre to Dee. They said as long as the bleeding is light and brownish (which it is) try not to panic. Although it’s not ‘normal’ and all bleeding should be monitored, up to half of the people doing IVF experience some degree of bleeding. The bleeding is usually just your body trying to expel trapped blood still in there from the procedures or from when the embryo burrowed into the uterine wall – what they call ‘implantation bleeding’. They told Dee to go to a Medlab for blood tests ASAP and they would check her progesterone levels and HCG levels which will hopefully help show whats going on.

13-December-2008(4 weeks 4 days)
A follow up blood test this week to check how Dee’s progesterone and HCG levels are. The HCG levels had risen to 370 which the clinic is really pleased about. Unfortunately Dee’s ovaries aren’t cooperating and haven’t managed to come properly back online after egg collection and start producing enough progesterone, her levels were at just 36. The clinic says anything above 30 should be OK but they should be over 80 before you can safely stop the progesterone support. Low progesterone levels can cause breakthrough bleeding. They said not to worry as lots of people doing IVF end up having to continue the pessaries (in the UK its standard practice for all IVF patients to stay on them until week 12 of pregnancy).

We’re excited but know that 20% of pregnancies result in miscarriage so we’re also trying to keep realistic and not blurt out the news to everyone until we feel safer. And we thought the main stress would end after the 2 week wait was over!

We went to Christmas in the Park tonight to relax and enjoy our early Christmas present!

9-December-2008 (The big day!!)

Well today is the day we get the results of our pregnancy test!! Finally the 2 week wait is over. It’s been a really stressful day waiting for the call so Dee went into work to get her mind off things. The call came around 12 noon, the nurse rang Dee and started to say the results…before being quickly reminded that we had planned to pick them up in an envelope from the clinic in person and didn’t want to be told over the phone. Almost a slip there! We wanted to find out together at the same time and not have to react all calm on the phone if the result was negative. So Dee called Aaron to let him know the results were in and jumped in the car to rush to the clinic and pick them up. What a gruelling trip, stuck in a traffic jam just trying to get onto the motorway. It took over an hour just to get from her work in the city out to the clinic in Ellerslie. When Dee arrived at the clinic she bumped into our doctor, Mary Birdsall in the corridor. Mary had a huge grin on her face when she saw Dee (although she said ‘I’m not saying anything, I won’t give anything away)’. Dee said she felt like Mary wanted to hug her and hoped like crazy it must all be good. Dee reckons the journey home with the sealed envelope sitting in the seat next to her was the most crazy stressed out hour she ever had and she just pleased she didn’t crash or back into anyone the state she was in.

We can’t begin to describe the awesome the feeling of opening the envelope and seeing the words ‘congratulations on your positive pregnancy test’ there in black and white!

A note also told Dee to call the clinic to talk to a nurse. The nurse said a positive result was anything over 30 and our HCG levels were a strong and clear 46. They said to keep on the progesterone support (pessaries) and come in for bloods in a few days so they could check all the levels keep creeping up steadily. The nurse said they calculate how many weeks pregnant we are from exactly 2 weeks before egg collection, so even though the eggs only fertilised 2 weeks ago we are 4 weeks pregnant (the date when most people would have had their last period).

The most fantastic (and traumatic) day! *Our baby* is due 18 August 2009. Feels like we just won the lottery, and in a way we did, we bet the odds. Hard to believe it has worked first time.

5-December-2008
At last Dee is feeling a bit better, and less swollen and painful. We will probably never know what it was but its definitely clearing up! Best news is that Aaron is well again and home, and Dee never even caught the slightest snuffle

2-December-2008
Dee is still incredibly sore and her stomach has swollen up. She looks about 5 months pregnant already and gained 2 kg in a day (even though not really eating). This is a big danger sign we were told to watch for and so after calling the clinic they confirm she definitely shouldn’t still be in that much pain. The worry is that it’s OHSS (Ovarian Hyper Stimulation Syndrome) which is ironically most common in IVF patients that fall pregnant; so it could be a good sign. They do blood tests and a scan to check she is not accumulating fluid in her abdomen; in the worst cases women are hospitalised and have to get the fluid drained to prevent it filling the lungs etc. The tests come back good with nothing obviously dangerous going on so the clinic tells Dee to stay on the maximum dose of panadol, which is safe even if pregnant, and they will keep monitoring her bloods. It could be pain from the embryo implanting or post Egg Collection related. EC is like any abdominal procedure and it’s common for people to have swelling, stomach muscles to stop working for a while and soreness. Still being in exile is driving Aaron crazy. He has taken to the drink.

30-November-2008
Dee is really sore and having lots of cramping. We are so scared something is going wrong as she can hardly move. What’s worse is that Aaron can’t even be there as he’s in exile with a cold. Aaron reckons its the most stressed hes ever been.

Aaron: It is!

But on the upside, we got some great news today; of the 3 embryos we left at the clinic two made it to the next ‘blastocyst’ stage. GREAT news. The weird thing is that the embryo we thought was ‘next best’ (that went 8 cell on the morning of embryo transfer) was the one that stopped growing. The 10 cell one and the crazy 15 cell that looked like it was growing too fast both got their act together. This is awesome news! We are having both frozen and it means that if this time we don’t get pregnant, or if we do and we want another child, we just need to defrost and implant. No nasty egg growing and collection or full IVF cycle will be needed. Our entire family could be there now All technically ‘twins’ as conceived on the same date… with some just kept in cryogenic suspension a few years. We have our fingers crossed that the embryo they transferred takes after its speedier siblings!

Aaron: My only concern now, is that the embryos will thaw out one day, fully grown into a world run by apes.

29-November-2008 (Nooooo!)
Aaron has woken up with a cold! Dee rang the clinic and they said they were really sorry but it was probably too late to avoid catching and just to try and stay as well clear of Aaron as she can, sleep in separate rooms if possible and strict instructions not to look after him. We decided Aaron has to go. Aaron rang Dee’s Dad and is going over there to stay until the cold clears up.

28-November-2008(Embryo Transfer Day)

This is the most exciting day yet, its all definitely happening! Dee’s bleeding stopped over night and she is feeling better. We got to the clinic at around 8am in the morning are all set to go! Dee had instructions to drink about 3 glasses of water to have a full bladder for ET so the ultrasound would be clear to help them guide and place the embyro into just the right spot in her uterus. Our acupuncturist met us out there so we could have a session before and then after the transfer, as studies show acupuncture on the day of transfer increases the success rate for IVF by between 10-15% and we want the best odds we can get. The before session was a bit uncomfortable, mainly because Dee was busting to go to the toilet through the whole thing.

The embryologist came in to talk to us and said that we had one high grade embryo at the 8 cell stage which was perfect for transfer and exactly what they want at day 3 after fertilisation. One of the others had just gone 8 cells that morning but was a little slower than they wanted, one was at 10 cells so slightly faster and one speedy one was at a crazy 15 cells. We had decided we would put the one back if we had a really good embryo and only transfer 2 if we got stuck with no really nice high grade embryos. So it was full steam ahead to transfer our perfect little 8 cell embryo.

The embryologist said they would leave the other 3 in the lab to see if they made the next ‘blastocyst’ stage of development (see below for details). The nurse warned us that less than 40% of people manage to get any to the blasto stage to freeze so not to get our hopes up too high. We just keep telling ourselves “It only takes 1!”

By the time the acupuncture session was over Dee was so uncomfortable and busting she was paranoid she would wee on the doctor and not hold on for the procedure. In the end they let her go and have a ‘very small wee’, which was really lucky because rather than take the normal 2-3 minutes to transfer the embryo we were in there for ages! It turns out the hole in Dee’s cervix is really tiny and it took ages to get the embryo in. They started the procedure using their usual device but it wouldn’t fit and neither did the next size catheter down so in the end they used the tiniest syringe they could find. Even when they got through the hole in the cervix, it took another several attempts to thread it through and into her uterus. They had about 5 goes, each time they would start putting the embyro in then check the ultrasound, check the placement, then remove it again back into the syringe and pass it back to the embryologist who would check the embryo was still in the syringe and put it back on ice while another attempt was made to line things up. Thank goodness we had a clinic that used ultrasound (not all do), as without it the doctor said she wouldn’t have been able to tell placement wasn’t right on each attempt. After 4-5 goes, and passing the embryo back and forth, checking it was still there, they finally got it in perfect position. A bit traumatic but done. Hey, we got there in the end, have to make them work for their money don’t we! They were almost apologetic saying for 99% of people it really was a quick easy procedure. Dee was happy just to be allowed to go to the loo at long last as we were in there for almost half an hour. OK, this day wasn’t as bad as egg collection, but it was still damned stressful.

Aaron: Man that was stressful! Seeing this tiny syringe being passed from embryologist to doctor, and back again, several times was almost too much to bear. One slip and it could all be over. I don’t want to go through that one again!

We now have a 2 week wait, followed by a blood test to see if the embryo has implanted properly and Dee is pregnant. Strict instructions are no swimming or baths, no vigorous exercise or sex, and no going near anyone with even the slightest snuffle or signs of a cold. At this stage infection or heat stress are the biggest things that might affect implantation. The acupuncture session immediately after transfer was great, and we left the clinic feeling really positive. We are finally ‘PUPO’ (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise)!

27-November-2008
We made the daily call to the clinic to check how our little embryos are doing, they are all dividing nicely, three are at 4 cells and one at 6 cells now. This means its all go for tomorrow, and we can go in for the embryo transfer in the morning. The embryologist recommended that we do a day 3 transfer rather than waiting until day 5 to see if the embryos transition to the blastocyst stage before implantation.

OK we know this is a bit technical sounding but basically, on day 3 the 8 celled fertilised egg is still very mobile, it would normally be busy moving on its way down the fallopian tubes towards the uterus and by day 5 it will have reached the uterus and have turned into a blastocyst. Blastocysts are the next stage of development when the cells in the fertilised egg start to organise themselves and specialise into cells that will become either baby or placenta and this new blasocyst has the ability to burrow into the uterus and implant itself. Transferring blastocyst stage embryos gives the highest chance of pregnancy because it’s all ready to settle in and start growing. By implanting a 3 day old fertilised egg, which wouldn’t normally be in the uterus yet, there’s always a chance it will go walkabout or not know what its doing in there. The catch 22 is that in a lab only about 40% of embyros make it to the blastocyst stage, and this is likely to be a far lower rate than if they were inside the human body where they should be.

We were hoping to have lots of embryos so we could have them all taken to day 5 and select a primo blastocyst for transfer hereby giving us the best odd of success. However, given we only have 4 embryos, by waiting longer we risk loosing all of them and having nothing to implant. The embryologist recommended we not wait but transfer the best looking 3 day embryo ASAP to give it the best shot at growing, so that’s the plan and its all on for tomorrow.

Dee is feeling quite down. She is still bleeding from the egg collection and still in pain which is making her worry that this is the worst possible time to be putting anything in there and expecting to get pregnant. We look at the stats which say less than 1% of people are still bleeding 2 days after collection, lucky us, yet again!

26-November-2008

The clinic called today to tell us that only 4 of our 10 eggs fertilised. To be honest we are a bit gutted; fertilisation rates are usually 70% so that’s quite low. We have to wonder whether the 4 that worked were eggs from those 4 biggest follicles we saw on the scans earlier. We are trying to be positive, after all it only takes one to work and we have 4.

Dee is still in a fair bit of pain from the procedure and still bleeding, they are making sure she stays topped up on panadol and say quite a few people are still bleeding a little the next day.

Today Dee also started a course of progesterone pessaries, 2 every 8 hours, to help support her system for the next few weeks – they will help ensure her period doesn’t come so that following the embryo transfer in a few days time the embryo is given time to implant.

25-November-2008 (Egg Collection)

Egg collection day at long last! So excited to finally be at this point. Our scan showed Dee has grown at least 10 follicles, and assuming there’s an egg in each we are hoping to have 10 eggs collected today. When we arrived at the clinic at 11am, they started with a quick ultrasound scan that showed Dee actually had 12 follicles now, 7 on one ovary and 5 on the other which is great news and ups our odds of a good harvest even more.

Waiting, waiting	Still cheery!	Lovely little folicles

Unfortunately things turned a bit to custard after that. They got the procedure started, and while we knew Dee had never had IV sedation before, what we now know is that it doesn’t work on her – at all! She basically ended up having the egg collection without pain relief. So much for ‘don’t worry we’ll give you lots of lovely drugs and you won’t remember a thing’.

They tried to fix the problem once they realised she was still fully awake and reacting as if she felt it all. They upped the dose of the meds, tried a different one on top of that, then more of that… nothing worked. Dee was still fully awake and communicating throughout the procedure. The procedure involves going in through the side of the vaginal wall with a needle directly into the ovary, then inserting the needle into each follicle one at a time and draining off the fluid inside each one, then the needle is removed and the procedure repeated for the ovary on the other side. The worst part was when the needle was initially inserted into each side through to the ovary. Dee was told to try and stay as still as possible but just couldn’t for those bits as it was too painful. After the needle was in each follicle was drained, and while this was also sore Dee could keep an eye on the screen so she knew when to brace for each one – at this stage having 12 follicles to drain didn’t feel quite as lucky. Dee says she would want full anaesthesia if she ever has to do this again as it was bloody awful!

Then things got even worse. By the time the procedure was over they had put such a cocktail of drugs in Dee that she had a really bad reaction. She was taken through to recovery and given a drink of water. Aaron then noticed that Dee wasn’t looking right and her breathing was getting funny so called in the nurse. When he turned back around, Dee had passed out completely.

Dee: It was freaky being woken up to a team of staff all around me trying to get me to wake up, an oxygen mask on, and people trying to get a drip in.

Aaron had almost wet himself by this point! Dee had gotten really dehydrated as her body tried to process all the drugs (they said she had had ‘veterinary level’ doses in the end to try and get pain relief working) so they wanted to get her on a drip, but due to the dehydration they couldn’t get a line in. At least 6 attempts were made by a range of people before they gave up. The needle just wouldn’t go in anywhere they tried – it actually bent rather than go into her arm, they did get one needle in but the vein was so small it went through it rather than into it so even that one was abandoned. Instead she had to try and drink lots, which resulted in lots of lovely vomiting. Joy!!

 

We were at the clinic all day, as each time they tried to get Dee sitting up she would faint and even hours later she couldn’t walk to the bathroom without going down. In the end they decided she needed to go home and sleep it off. We finally left the clinic around 5pm, Dee sent out in a wheelchair with lots of vomit cups but at least its all over and the good news is that they got 10/12 eggs out. Fingers crossed that lots fertilise so we have heaps of lovely embryos for future tries because we don’t want to do this bit again!

23-November-2008 (Trigger injection)
Well this morning’s blood test went really well and we are all set for the trigger injection. It needs to be done exactly 36 hours before egg collection to stimulate all our lovely eggies to mature at the same time. The trigger injection is probably the biggest, scariest and complicated needle yet. We had to take it at 11:30 pm tonight so we’ll be ready for egg collection 11:30 Tuesday morning. If all goes well that’s the last needle Dee will need – no more daily injections and were are ready to move on to the next phase!

21-November-2008
Well, we had our scan today to see how all our follicles are growing and great news. Dee has 5 follicles growing on each ovary so her body is very organised. The ideal size for them to be at is 20mm each by the date of egg collection. The 5 on Dees right ovary are already at 15, 15, 15, 12, and 10mm and on her left: 15, 13, 10, 10, 10. They will all be growing at between 1.5 – 2mm a day so a couple more days growth and we are set to go. The clinic was really pleased we have four 15 mm ones. Our egg collection is going to be timed according to those because if they wait longer we could loose those front runners. The hope is that most of the others will still be big enough to use as well. So it’s looking like egg collection will only be about 4 days away. Dee is going to have more blood tests in a few days and they will then set the date for collection.

Dee should start to feel very swollen soon with ten 2cm round follicles crowded round in her abdomen! We are so relieved and happy, great to know everything was working in there, now off to have a celebratory lunch.

18-November-2008
Just a quick update. Blood test results came in to check Dee’s response to the Gonal F (Stimms) injections and everything is looking perfect. Full steam ahead! Dee is definitely feeling bloated now so hopefully lots of lovely eggs are growing. The injections are getting more difficult, its harder and harder to find a spot where the needle goes in easy as Dee’s tummy is toughening up in spots from overuse. But not long to go now.

16-November-2008

Well four days on stimms injections, Dee’s not feeling much so far and hoping something is going on in there. Lots of baby showers happening this weekend. We’re trying not to get too excited but its really hard – it seems like everyone is either pregnant or has newborns at the moment. Because we’re not telling most people about IVF Dee felt really weird at the baby showers, keeping quiet with everyone talking babies. Sure people must think its weird we are both so suddenly interested (and knowledgeable) about everything pregnancy related.

12-November-2008

A big day today. Dee has started the big Gonal-F injections (or ’stimms’) that will stimulate lots of eggs to be produced. We’re on quite a low dose as it turns out Dee has polycystic ovaries (though not the syndrome that’s something different again – in NZ 21% of women apparently have polycystic ovaries).

Polycystic ovaries tend to be more senstitive and produce lots more eggs, this can be bad since if you produce lots of eggs its likely most will be small and immature, the aim is to get between 8-12 nice big eggs growing. Polycsytic ovaries also make people more prone to develop OHSS (Ovarian Hyper stimulation syndrome) which can be quite dangerous, and lead to fluid build up inside the abdomen and hospitaisation to drain everything. So the clinic is taking things easy and monitoring how Dee reacts.

When we heard about Polycystic ovaries, we Googled it to find out what it was all about and we found papers on the subject written by none other than Dr Mary Birdsall. She’s a pro in this area which is refreshing to know.

So, lots of needles at the moment. Still on the Buserelin injections in the morning and now Gonal-f ones at night! If Dee was a bit needle phobic before she’s definitely over it now (in fact she reckons they are quite neat to do).

10-November-2008
Today Dee had a blood test to check she was ‘down regging’ – in effect that her body’s own hormone systems had been turned off, and yep, nothing is happening, all shut down. No mood swings or bad symptoms at all so far, in fact Aaron reckons Dee’s been more cheerful lately.

Looks like we’re all set to start egg growing and Gonal-f injections on Wednesday. Yay.

2-November-2008
Wouldn’t you know it, today was set down as the day for Dee to start Buserelin injections for IVF. The Buserelin will shut off her pituitary gland stopping hormone production. For IVF they need her hormone systems shut down so that they can take over with specific drugs and regulate everything. The clinic say be prepared for problems with heat regulation, mood swings, bloating… essentially it can be like going through menopause overnight! All IVF injections go into the lower tummy just under the belly button on either side. Dee was a little worried about them, but it was actually pretty easy – Aaron has been told he will definitely NOT be allowed to have a go though! Dee a control freak, no!

Dr Bourke	Fun with needles	Just like that!

Now some of you may *click* here that, yes, today is the day of the Auckland half marathon! What this means is that Dee is not allowed to run it, she is gutted about the bad timing. Aha, now you know the real reason why Dee bailed. She thought it might happen this way, so did her own 20km run last week so she could feel like she had kind of run it anyway. Essentially overheating her system is not advised at this stage given she may not be able to sweat properly, and her body should be ‘taking it easy’ from now on and not getting over stressed. She was considering running right up until the last minute but we decided it just wasn’t worth risking anything right now and that IVF was our bigger prioirity – next time Dee.

8-October-2008
Yay! Dee finally gets to make a start, as she goes on the pill today. It seems ironic the first step in IVF is going on the pill (Mycrogynon), but it will regulate her cycle and make sure the start of IVF injections can be timed exactly.

2-September-2008
Its confirmed, we qualify for a round of free publicly funded IVF, in November 2009. Great news, as it means if our first private treatment fails we can have another shot in November next year. Back-up plan in place.

28-August-2008

Aaron: Today I go in and get my testicles massacred. OK, that’s a bit over-dramatic because compared to having a vasectomy reversal, needles and scalpels in your testicles is childsplay.

The procedure that we will need to undergo in order to get pregnant is called ICSI. It stands for intracytoplasmic sperm injection and as the name suggests it is where sperm from the male is put into an egg from the woman by an embryologist. Now seeing as Aaron cannot eject sperm the regular way (due to the aforementioned vasectomy) they need to go in surgically and get it out.

We arrived at FA and were ushered into a room for Aaron to get changed. Then the doctor and embryologist came in and had a chat, we signed forms saying they could freeze my sperm and whatnot, then waited until the theater was free. Once in, the Dr started giving Aaron the happy drugs and he slowly started to feel a little “groovy”. The procedure is done with IV sedation and not a general anaesthetic, which is designed to make you feel weird and forget that anything ever happened. Unfortunately Aaron wasn’t forgetting much and could feel the needle go into his testicles again and again and again and again. After no luck in extracting sperm, the Dr decided to bring out the big guns – the scalpel. An incision was made in the testicle and material was extracted, from which the sperm could be removed.

Aaron: I hate being resistant to drugs like this. I’ve always been like it, even at the dentist where they normally need to give me extra doses to numb my teeth. I remember when I had my wisdom teeth removed. I was happily in la-la land afer IV sedation when I woke up to see a dentist with a chisel in one hand, and an hammer in the other, trying to extract my teeth.

August-2008

The first thing we need to do now is to work out who to go and talk to. Thankfully this is becoming an easy decision because a number of people we’ve mentioned IVF to have either gone through IVF themselves, are thinking of it, or know someone who had and they are all recommending Fertility Associates in Greenlane – specifically a Dr Mary Birdsall.

Mary was great! She had a friendly demeanour and she answered all our crazy questions with ease. She was even a consumate comedienne. When asked “What is the waiting list time if we decide to go private?” she replied “Darling, it’s like a store. You walk in, pay your money, and walk out with what you want.”

In the end, even though we will probably qualify for public funding we’ve decided to go privately – and here’s why.

Women 37 years old (Dee’s age) or younger have just a 42% success rate with IVF. For every 100 women (37 or under) undergoing treatment:
93 make it to a successful egg collection
53 go on to have a positive pregnancy test
42 have a child

The success rate drops drastically after 37, to just 30% for women aged 38. It was scary to see in all the statistics and graphs we were given just how much of a decline in fertility and success rates occurs at 38. It’s obvious we can’t afford to wait for public funding. The waiting lists for publicly funded treatments mean we wouldn’t be up for IVF until November 2009, when Dee would be 38, a 42% chance is low enough. Thank goodness we sold our Verran Rd property and have the extra 10k needed. IVF is definitely not cheap.

And finally, there’s a little relief in that because we will likely qualify for public funding, going private won’t lose us our place on the public list. This means that even if our first IVF attempt fails, we can go straight on with the publicly funded round and get our second try free in November 2009. Sounds like the best option.

2006 – The Start(Super brief version)

Around 2006, after about 16 years together without children, we decided that we wanted to start a family. Unfortunately we were hampered ever so slightly by a vasectomy that I had had many years before. Nonetheless, after some consultations it seemed that we had a pretty good (70%) chance of reversing it. The only bummer was that through the public system it would have meant we had to wait about 2 years in order to build up enough points to get funding. Therefore we forked over a large sum of money totalling around $5000 and Aaron went under the knife at a private clinic.

Aaron: If any guys are going into a vasectomy thinking that they can just reverse it later, rethink. Not only because there is a very real risk of it not working, but it is the most vicious thing that could be done to your testicles that I could ever imagine. Did I say testicles, oops, I meant testicCLE because after the surgery, for the following several weeks, you are left with one very large mass where both your testicles have joined into an amorphous sphere of who knows what. It’s frigging sore.

Anyway, after several negative sperm count tests and waiting for over a year to see if it would come right, things weren’t looking good so we realised that we’d have to look at IVF.

So the journey began…………..